15w, 1d

I think I may have broke my husband. Oops!

 The other day when I started panicking that we needed to start getting the nursery ready and saying just how much stuff we needed, I didn't realize my husband was actually paying attention. I think it was just my hormones getting to me (as they've been doing a lot lately! Wow!) but unfortunately, he was listening and calculating prices in his head. He's now trying to work 7 days a week until we have all of our baby stuff. We're not hurting moneywise at all, and while the extra money would be wonderful to get our baby stuff while building up an emergency fund, I think it's a bit excessive to do! I don't want him burning himself out, so I said maybe he should do that just every other week, but he's very set on his plan. I like that he takes all the baby stuff so seriously, but this might be too much! However, seeing the bigger paychecks each week seems to be his way of becoming calmer about everything.

 School starts next week. I suggested a while ago that it's not really worth doing only one class a semester, so he should try to do two easier classes. He ended up with a hard class and one medium class. Besides time restraint, this means that for 5 days a week, he'll be going to morning classes - which makes it much harder to fit in doctor appointments! It didn't even occur to me that we'd have to squeeze them in too. He offered to take the semester off to go to all the doctor appointments because he doesn't want to miss hearing the heartbeat, and I cried at the idea of going alone, but if anything, he'll need to skip a semester when the baby comes. Luckily, my doctor's office is only about 10 or 15 minutes away from college, so we should be fine in doing short appointments after classes and before work, which is our current plan.

But this is another reason why I worry about him working 7 days a week steadily. 6 days is plenty of a workload (6 days is currently mandatory again), but ever since he got sick over Christmas and we had two small paychecks in a row, he's been trying to get in gear to save more money. Especially because there's another superviser position on his floor open right now that he's trying for. I really want him to get the job, because it's so much safer than the job he's currently doing, and after he came home with a nasty looking, second degree heat burn on his hand last week, I really want him doing something safer. But the job is a big paycut - by about 400$ a paycheck because he'll no longer make piece rate, which gets us most of our money. His solution is to work hard now while applying, and see what we can put away in that time before possibly getting the paycut. I see the logic in this, but I also see the risks.

 I'm just so glad that our baby is so well timed. Since the baby is coming in the middle of summer, we don't have to worry about him going to classes, or even finishing this semester because he'll be long done by then. We'll have a good two months to get everything ready while he's out of collegebefore baby comes, so that will be a lot of help. It would be so much harder to have the baby during a semester, because if he misses more than one, we'll have to start paying off loans, which we're already doing for me (though hopefully mine can be finished pretty quickly.)

So, along with having to figure out when to make doctor appointments around his busy schedule, figuring out how much money we need for the baby, and my stomach finally starting to grow, things are starting to seem real. It's easy to forget I'm having a baby in my mind, half the time I just see the symptoms and it feels like I'm sick for weeks on end. Without the baby making any movements that I can feel, it sorta seems sometimes that I'm just gaining weight with an excuse! Of course, with this becoming more real, I start to feel antsy. I understand Dh, because I know he's just feeling the same way I do. Except, instead of dreading and worrying about labor and trying to think of birthing plans and looking up the best brands to buy for baby furniture and researching recalls, he's trying to figure out how to best support his growing family.

 Thankfully, even though we both have our own fears and anxiety about the next few months, we're not feeling any of the tension between us. Instead, we've been able to keep talking about what needs to happen, which I know really helps my fears at least to ease up. Almost every night while laying in bed, we discuss something about the baby, or doctor appointments, or work to help us make plans and feel like we're in control of everything we need to be, and that calms me down a lot.

 On a lighter note, I seem to be addicted to the worst show ever, 16 and Pregnant. Really, I hate it and I get mad at all the people on each episode, but I'm fascinated, as I am with just about any show dealing with pregnancy. The Baby Story and Bringing Home Baby, which are about families of normal age, just aren't on much unless I want to wake up really early (and since I'm having horrible migraines all night long that cause me to barely sleep, that's not going to happen). So I'm left watching teenagers being pregnant, since that's on MTV almost 24/7. Today I discovered that I didn't see most of season 1, so I'm catching up between doing chores and needing to pee, literally, about every 15 minutes.