2012 in review

2012 was the best year of my life.

There has been some great years in my life. Surviving cancer, getting married, getting our first house, the birth of our first daughter, and while all of those were amazing, 2012 has them beat.

There has been nothing better in my life than watching my daughter turn from a little blob of a baby into a real person. Someone who understands what they like and don't like; who can make decisions and form real thoughts, who has their own independent ideas, and who grows a little more every day. Nothing compares to the 365 days I spent with this little girl, watching as every day she found a way to amaze me. She learned so much and so often. She learned rapidly, and surprised me with skills that I didn't expect for months or years yet. She constantly inspired me, surprised me, amazed me, and made me proud. My love for her has grown so much that it's scary. I look at her sleeping and my heart just wants to burst. After 18 months, I still get tempted to wake her up in the middle of the night just to see her smile and get a few minutes of extra play and hugs.

I'm so glad I can say that I never missed a moment of it. Every single day of her life, every moment of new exploration and adventure, has been witnessed by me and that's so so special. When I was pregnant with her, Bill would tell me how it made him sad to know that working would make him miss a lot of big moments in her life. I agreed that it was sad, but I had no idea. No idea of how big an impact she'd make on our hearts. No idea how no matter how many pictures I take, videos I shoot, and conversations of special moments she had from the day, none of it could accurately depict that great moment for him. Something was always lost in translation. The giggle in the video didn't sound quite as giddy, the smile wasn't quite as vivacious, the little subtle things she did that really made it beautiful weren't quite as obvious when I tried to capture it. Knowing what I do now, it would break my heart to be in his place. But I love how much he tries, how he soaks up every minute left of the day to see her and play and talk to her. He asks for more pictures and stories about her day. He tells me how excited he is for another baby because Katie is just so wonderful, we can't wait to have another one that will be so loved and incredible as her.

I saw a question on a baby board asking what was my favorite part of 2012 with my baby. My mind went blank, not because I couldn't think of a great moment, but because I was avalanched with so many. It would take hours to list my favorite moments.

It's been such an incredible year, but the first one I wasn't sad to let go. I lived it to the fullest, and I'm looking forward to the next year. 2013 holds so much potential. Katie's going to continue to grow and learn and amaze me. She'll become a two year old and more importantly, a big sister. I can't wait to have this baby and explore their personality too, but just as much, I can't wait to see how Katie grows to adapt to having a new sibling to adore and play with. I think she'll make an amazing big sister. She's so full of smiles and play, and she plays so well with other kids.

2012 will always be a year full of memories. I can't wait to see what new memories will be made this year!